Back Across The Glacier
by Freelance Fanfictioner
Summary: What if Ayla realized Jondalar is not the man of her dreams after all? What if she decided to go back across the continent and rejoin her Mamutoi family? AU.
1. Chapter 1

**Back across the glacier**

_A/N: The last two (no, make it three) books of the Earth Children series left me deeply dissatisfied. The plot was contrived, the characters were made of cardboard, and the closure was so inadequate I kind of began to wish Ayla had never left the Lion Camp. So, in this little AU of mine she makes it back across the continent to the Mamutoi. _

Ayla felt her eyes stinging and burning as she glimpsed the familiar surroundings of the Lion Camp. She blinked back unshed tears, surveying the lovely prospect of a bright and golden autumn day. The Camp, she knew, should be back from Summer Meeting by now. She thought of the reunion with some trepidation – it has been over two years since her departure, after all – but she knew she would be accepted. She had been made a Mamutoi, adopted into the Lion Camp, and she could always find a home at the Mammoth Hearth.

On her way she came upon a thick row of blackberry bushes, heavily laden with round ripe berries. The harvest should be plentiful this season, Ayla noted to herself. Suddenly she heard a sound and froze in place, alert and ready to fight or flee if need be. But a moment later she realized it was only a woman, a plump motherly woman who carried a gathering basket. Another moment later, the woman had noticed Ayla, let out a gasp, and the basket fell from her slackened grip. Berries came tumbling down in all directions.

"Nezzie!" cried Ayla as tears obscured her vision again. The woman ran a hand over her eyes, as though unable to believe what she saw.

"Ayla! It is you! It is really you!" She approached and locked Ayla in a spontaneous, warm embrace. "We never thought we would see you again!" Nezzie looked around, puzzled, and a frown appeared between her eyebrows. "Where is Jondalar?" she asked and, seeing the pained expression on Ayla's face, added in a faltering voice. "Did he – is he - "

Ayla swallowed the lump in her throat. "He is fine, Nezzie," she assured the older woman. "Or at least he was fine when I left the Zelandonii a year ago."

Nezzie gave a nod, though it was plain she understood only in part. Ayla herself didn't feel prepared to delve into the subject right now. She couldn't even begin to explain how, shortly after arriving with Jondalar at the land of his people, she realized she probably should never have followed him there in the first place. Things were very different from how she imagined and dreamed and planned. Very different indeed...

"So you are back now? Back for good?" pressed Nezzie.

"Yes," said Ayla. "Luckily for me, some Sungaea people who were on a long Journey came to the Zelandonii lands shortly after my arrival. I was able to go back across the glacier with them, and we stuck together most of the way. We only split a few days ago, and I made the last part of the journey alone."

And, though Ayla didn't say so aloud, it was her luck that she never stopped taking her special tea, the one that stopped new life from beginning. A baby would have made the journey back impossible. Though often she ached with the emptiness of lost possibilities, she knew it was for the best.

Nezzie beamed at her. "I am so glad, Ayla," she said. "Everyone will be thrilled to have you back. We never got another healer after you left, you know, and now that old Mamut is gone we need a skilled healer more than ever."

Ayla raised her head with a jolt. "Mamut is dead?"

She shouldn't have been surprised, of course – Mamut was so old, after all – but her pain was more intense than reason would allow. She couldn't stand any more losses.

"It happened a short time before we went to the Summer Meeting," Nezzie told her as they gathered the berries that had fallen and put them back into the basket. "We hoped we would get a new Mamut at the Meeting, but it seems we will have to wait until next year."

"What about everyone else?" asked Ayla as they walked towards the Lion Camp lodge.

"Oh, we are doing well, for the most part," said Nezzie. "Danug has Promised a girl from another camp, and it looks like they will be mated at the next Summer Meeting. And Latie has already been spoken for by several young men. They were good offers, but she didn't seem particularly thrilled about any of them... well, she has time to think, she is young yet. Deegie and Branag have set camp not far from here and come to visit often. She has a little girl and is pregnant with her second child now. Fralie has had another baby, too, and little Bectie has grown so much, you won't recognize her..."

"What about Talut? And Tulie?" asked Ayla.

"Oh, they are as good as ever. Last winter was mild, even Crozie got through it without being any worse. Just wait until they see you, they will be so surprised – but wait, Ayla – where are your animals?"

Another grimace of pain flitted across Ayla's face. "I had to leave them behind," she told Nezzie. "They barely made it across the glacier once, I couldn't put them through it again, though not having a horse anymore meant I could carry far less with me. I managed to find a home for Wolf in one of the Zelandonii caves, once the people there got used to the idea of a tame wolf. And Whinney... it was hard to let her go, Nezzie, and I'm not sure she will ever adapt to living in the wild. She was so tame, she might be easy prey for hunters. But Racer had grown, and he was never as tame as she was, and when I left it seemed she would follow him to live with a herd of wild horses. Still..." her eyes misted over again. "It was hard. They were my friends."

Nezzie patted her arm sympathetically. "I am sorry, Ayla, but perhaps you will be able to tame some more animals. You have such a way with them."

"Maybe," said Ayla, "if the animals are young, and have the right temper to be tamed - "

As they were walking and talking, the Lion Camp drew nearer. They could see some children playing in the distance – little children, by the look of them. Ayla was sure none of them would be old enough to remember her.

"Ah," said Nezzie, "look! Crisavec and Bectie are here, and Nuvie and Hartal... and..."

A boy detached himself from the group and toddled over to them. He was about two and a half years old. And though a long time has passed, the distinctive features of his face and his springy, curly hair left no room for doubt.

"That is Ralev!" exclaimed Ayla. "Isn't it? I met him once, when he was only a baby."

"Yes, this is Ralev," said Nezzie, "no wonder you recognized him at once – his looks are something special, aren't they?"

The first genuine smile – a smile of relief – spread across Ayla's face. "This means Tricie is here, too," she said. She knew what the child's presence must mean – Tricie had come to make a hearth with Ranec after all. She had hoped it would be so; she could never stop feeling guilty about the heartbreak and humiliation she brought to the dark-skinned man who had wanted her so much. But if he has Tricie now, all is right, and her riding off with Jondalar doesn't matter anymore.

Nezzie's face darkened unexpectedly. "Ayla," she said quietly, taking her by the arm, "I think I must tell you this before you go into the lodge and meet the others. It is true that Ranec and Tricie were mated – he made her an offer, and she accepted, and they made a hearth at the very same Summer Meeting which you and Jondalar had left. Now," she went on, "at the time I thought it was a rash decision. Forgive me, Ayla, but Ranec was deeply hurt by your rejection. I know you couldn't help it," she hastened to add, "but it was so. He was acting out of hurt pride, and Tricie probably knew it, but still she agreed to become his mate. And well, she was a good woman, and already had a child of Ranec's spirit, and he liked her very much – he wasn't as deeply attracted to her as he was to you, of course, but after a time they did seem settled, happy."

Ayla listened to the story with an odd sense of foreboding. "And what happened then?"

Nezzie heaved a sigh. "Tricie died in childbirth a year ago. None of us expected that, she was young and healthy and had already had a baby before. It came as a real blow to us all, but most of all, of course, to Ranec."

Ayla bit her lip and looked down at the child. His large, intelligent brown eyes met her own. "I am so sorry," she whispered, looking back at Nezzie. "They deserved to be happy together."

Nezzie picked up the child and balanced him on her hip. "I adopted Ralev to our hearth," she told Ayla, "to give him more status. This, essentially, makes him and Ranec brothers – but Ralev still continues to live at the Fox Hearth with Ranec and Wymez. Ranec loves the boy."

"I'm sure he does," Ayla whispered sadly.

And, steeling herself to face painful memories, she continued to walk towards the camp with Nezzie.

_A/U: I'm sorry, but I had to dismiss the animals. I found the scenes with them incredibly tedious, and there's no way I would write anything similar._

_Your comments, suggestions and requests will be most welcome!_


	2. Chapter 2

The air reverberated with the beat of drums and pipes, singing, and many dancing feet. A bearded, red-haired giant of a man made his way through the crowd to Ayla, pulled her into a bear hug, and then held her at arm's length, beaming.

"I can't tell you how happy I am to see you back, Ayla," he boomed. "Things just haven't been the same without you. You were always meant to stay with us, I think." Ayla gave him a smile. She knew the big man had not meant anything hurtful, it was just his way to say what he thought without reservation.

"It is good to be back, Talut," she said. "It feels like home."

"The Lion Camp is your home!" he nodded vigorously. "Wait, I'll go and fetch some more of my special bouza. This is going to be a real celebration!"

He turned on his heel and disappeared into the earth lodge. Ayla decided that she would not drink any more, the one cup she had was more than enough – she had no wish to wake up next morning with a headache. People all around her, meanwhile, were cheering on Talut, urging him to bring more of the fermented drink he was so good at making.

The sky above still blazed orange and purple, but a big bonfire was already set to ward off the chill. A wide selection of food was brought out, including a huge sizzling slab of mammoth meat to which everybody helped themselves. There were fat tender ptarmigan, freshwater fish and molluscs, and a variety of grains, roots and fruit, both fresh and dry.

Ayla knew the Mamutoi loved to have a reason to celebrate, but still it felt incredibly flattering to be the source and center of all the happiness, though she didn't feel exactly happy herself yet. She was relieved to have completed a long and dangerous journey before winter, no doubt, and she was glad she would not need to go anywhere again before the Summer Meeting, but there was still a dull ache within her which only time would be able to cure.

She walked over to Fralie, who was sitting at some distance from the fire, nursing her baby. Little Bectie was playing by her side. Noticing Ayla, Fralie lifted up her head and smiled.

"Congratulations on the new baby, Fralie," said Ayla, looking at the little face. "This one is a girl too, isn't she?"

"Yes," said Fralie, "I called her Crolie. I was fortunate that this last pregnancy and birth went so smoothly for me, Ayla. If it had been like it was with Bectie, I don't think I would have made it through without you around. I was especially worried after what happened to Tricie," she added, shaking her head sadly.

"What happened?" Ayla asked, lowering her voice. She stole a glance in the direction where Ranec was standing. She noticed that, though not truly withdrawn, he didn't seem too keen on the celebrations.

"Well, nobody anticipated any difficulty," Fralie told her. "Tricie already had one child, and she didn't have any trouble birthing Ralev. The pregnancy went well, too. Tricie's mother came to visit once and suggested that Tricie and Ranec could travel to their camp before Tricie's time came, so that she would birth in the presence of a good woman-healer. But Tricie laughed off her concerns, said she would be fine on her own. And then... the labor began, but it didn't progress. I think the baby was positioned badly, and in the end she just had no strength left. Oh, Ayla," her voice cracked, "it was terrible. She was just slowly dying, and none of us could do anything."

Ayla bit her lip. In some cases, she had been able to shift a baby within its mother's womb when it was badly positioned. And she could make an infusion of raspberry leaves and other herbs, to strengthen the womb and help the contractions. If she had been here... she shook her head. If she had been here, if she had remained behind, most likely Tricie wouldn't be in Lion Camp at all. But still – when she left, she hadn't paused to consider that she is leaving these people, her people, without a competent healer. She had not bothered to look for someone who could replace her, nor to pass at least some rudiments of her knowledge to other women of the camp. If only she had told Nezzie how to make the infusion that helps women in labor...

She got up resolutely. She felt very uncomfortable about what she was going to do, but she thought it had better be sooner than later. Mustering up her courage, she walked out to Ranec, holding her hands to him with her palms open. He acknowledged her friendly gesture by touching his palms to hers.

"Welcome back, Ayla," he said warmly.

"Thank you, Ranec," she nodded, feeling thoroughly undeserving of such a generous welcome. She realized that, despite the time that had passed, he could never forget the circumstances of her departure. "I am sorry for your loss," she offered, because she didn't know what else to say. He nodded.

"I have seen Ralev," said Ayla, "he's beautiful."

"Yes, he is a fine boy," said Ranec. "I only wish that..." he shook his head. "Well, never mind. That is some great feast, have you had any of Tulie's loaf cakes?"

"Yes, they were very good, they always are," said Ayla, "but I don't think I will stay up too long, myself."

"You must be tired. You will be staying at the Mammoth Hearth, of course?"

"Yes," nodded Ayla, and just as she was beginning to feel the awkwardness dispelling, Ranec lifted his dark eyes and stared into hers, and asked the question she feared:

"Where is Jondalar?"

She made herself meet his gaze unflinchingly. "With the Zelandonii," she told him.

"Why..." he started, but stopped himself just in time. "Never mind. I shouldn't be asking – well, anyway, I think Ralev is tired. I had better go and help him to his bed."

Ayla was feeling very tired indeed, but her mind was alive. Someone had arranged a sleeping platform for her at the Mammoth Hearth and piled clean furs on top of it, and Ayla felt very comfortable lying snuggled there and looking at the flickering small light of the oil lamp, but sleep was tardy in coming. She had never seen this hearth without the presence of old Mamut.

She was only just beginning to drift off when she woke because a small hand shifted aside the leather drape that was supposed to give her some privacy in the crowded space of the earth lodge. Ayla looked up and saw Ralev's brown eyes, intelligent and wide awake.

"What is the matter?" she whispered. "Have you woken up?"

The child nodded. "Can I stay here?" he indicated her sleeping furs. Ayla noticed he spoke better than most boys his age.

She patted the space beside her, and Ralev climbed onto her sleeping platform and snuggled in with his head in her lap. Ayla sat with him, running her hand through his curls and murmuring tunelessly to him until the child had fallen asleep. Then she noticed Ranec's dark form stir at the Fox Hearth. He looked around, obviously wondering where the child has gone. He looked in the direction where some tired children were sleeping in a heap, and it was clear to Ayla he was thinking that perhaps Ralev had woken up and decided to join them.

"Ranec," she called quietly. The lodge was asleep.

He turned to the sound of her voice and walked over to her. An odd expression spread across his face when he saw the son of his hearth sleeping with his head on Ayla's lap.

"I'm sorry," he said. "He must have woken you."

"It doesn't matter," said Ayla, "I don't mind." It was true. The gentle weight and warmth of the child was comforting. "He can stay here tonight," she offered.

"Thank you," said Ranec, and after a pause added, "he does that sometimes. Gets up in the middle of the night and wanders around the lodge. I doubt he still remembers Tricie, he was too young – and Nezzie is very good to him – but he sometimes looks for... for his mother, I think. Are you sure you don't mind? I can carry him back to his bed if you like."

"There's no need to," Ayla assured him, and after a lingering look at the little boy, Ranec went back to bed. She lay down and snuggled next to the child, and his soft, deep breathing finally lulled her to sleep.


	3. Chapter 3

"It was not your fault, Ayla, you know," Ranec said suddenly.

She stared at him in surprise. His voice was quiet, so that no other member of the Lion Camp could hear it. It was one of the last warm days of autumn, and most of the Camp had taken advantage of this to go out to the nearest river, splash about in the water and gather some of the last berries of the season.

Ayla and Ranec were sitting side by side on the riverbank, dangling their feet in the water. Nearby, Ralev was busy looking for conical freshwater shells. Not far from them, Tronie took this opportunity to give her children a good scrub with the aid of some ground soaproot.

"What do you mean?" frowned Ayla.

He sighed. "I know you," he said, "and I know you have been thinking that what happened to Tricie was, in part, your fault. It was not. I was her mate, I was the one responsible for her well-being. I shouldn't have been so complacent. I should have made sure there was a healer available for her. Remember the winter you had stayed with us? The time when you saved Fralie's baby girl? I should have remembered that, too. I should have realized how important it was to have someone around who knows what they were doing. None of us knew what to do for Tricie when things went wrong, and so she just slipped away," a grimace of pain flitted across his dark face.

Ayla placed a hand on his shoulder. "It is not just about Tricie and her baby," she said gently. "It was irresponsible of me to leave the way I did. The Lion Camp was – is – my family, and I left you without a healer. I should not have done this. I should not have left... that way," she finished rather awkwardly, avoiding a direct look at Ranec. All of the Mamutoi, not just the Lion Camp, knew she had run off on him just before the Matrimonial, and she knew he could never live this down.

"You had no choice," Ranec said matter-of-factly.

She stared at him in surprise. "No choice?" she repeated.

"It was hard for me to come to terms with that, but after some time had passed, I realized you had to leave with Jondalar," he said boldly. "At that moment, you had to go with him – and you couldn't delay your departure, or you'd have to stay another winter, and he was impatient to go home to his people. If you hadn't left, you would have always wondered what might have been. You would have been miserable... and so would I," he finished with a gentle smile. "So in a way, Ayla, you did us both a favor."

Ayla felt ever so slightly miffed. It was a relief to know he had really forgiven her, but somewhere deep down, her pride was wounded when she heard he took her leaving as a "favor".

Ralev brought her a handful of shells. "For you," he said. Ayla rewarded the child with a wild, delighted smile.

"Thank you," she said, taking the shells. Several of them were large and beautiful, with a mother-of-pearl sheen. "These are lovely."

"He seems very taken with you," Ranec observed, while watching the son of his hearth start a complicated structure of sand, sticks and stones. The old Ranec would probably have added, "and who could blame him?" - but he was a changed man now. More mature, more level-headed, more thinking, and a lot less carefree.

"I'm not sure I am supposed to ask this," he went on hesitantly, "but I... I have been thinking about this for a while now, and... I was wondering – why did you leave Jondalar?"

Ayla sighed. She knew that not just he, but the entire Lion Camp has been wondering the same thing, though everybody avoided inquiring directly, no doubt because Nezzie told them not to. However, if anyone had a right to know, it was Ranec.

"Jondalar was not... not the man I thought he was," she said slowly. "He was the perfect man when it was just the two of us living in my valley, but when we came to spend the winter with the Mamutoi, I saw a different side of him. I ignored it, though. When we reached his home, he changed even more. He was on familiar ground, I was a stranger. He became jealous and possessive – you have seen that in him, I think. He didn't want to share me with any other man, but he expected me to share him with other women. There was one woman, Marona, whom he nearly Promised before. Not long after we arrived, I walked in on him sharing Pleasures with her. He then told me he felt – guilty – for having left her behind, and said that he'd like me to accept her as a sister-mate." She looked directly at Ranec now. "_He _had expected me to leave everything behind, to give up my family, the first clan of the Others I have met, the first people of my kind who had made me feel welcome, who wanted me, who adopted me and made me one of their own. He didn't care about me disappointing you, but when it came to him, he couldn't disappoint Marona."

"And so you left."

"And so I left. I didn't have to leave the Zelandonii, of course," Ayla explained. "They were good people, and they made me feel welcome, too. But they are not as open-hearted as the Mamutoi, and they would only be willing to adopt me if I mated one of them. I could have found a home and a mate in another cave, of course, but I preferred to go back. To go back to the people who wanted me for my own, and not just as a mate for one of their men."

Ralev got tired of playing quietly and, sneaking up on Ayla, splashed her with a faceful of water. She laughed, caught the child, and began a playful tussle with him. Up on the trees, leaves glowed gold and orange in the rays of the autumn sun. Winter would come soon – her first winter back home.


	4. Chapter 4

Ayla watched with a smile how Ralev made an attempt to sit up and play with Hartal and Bectie, though he kept rubbing his eyes with his knuckles for a while. Eventually, he staggered to the fur-padded sleeping platform the tired children sometimes shared at night. She noticed Ranec's eyes following the son of his hearth too.

_He seems better adjusted, _she thought to herself. She didn't mind the little boy creeping into her furs sometimes, but she liked to see Ralev like this, more active and outgoing. After receiving a healthy dose of attention from Nezzie, Ayla and Ranec, he was content to play with his friends for hours, only coming back to the hearth for meals.

Despite having her furs all to herself, though, Ayla woke that night. She propped herself up on her elbow and, glancing towards the Fox Hearth, noticed Ranec sitting on his bed. His head was in his hands. She hesitated. Should she approach him? She didn't know how he would take it, but her nature would not allow her to see a fellow human being in distress without trying to help. She quickly threw a leather wrap around herself, slipped her feet into her soft indoor footwear, and padded over.

"Ranec?" she said quietly, placing a hand on his shoulder.

He lifted his head. He hadn't been crying, but his face was controted with pain. "There is no need to worry, Ayla," he said, "I have only been thinking."

"About what?" she asked, dropping her voice to a whisper, though the curtain around Wymez's sleeping platform was drawn, and soft snoring issued from within.

"It is just... so unfair," Ranec said in a rush. "Tricie waited for me for a year. She then had to cope with... with not being my first choice. I was not very sure, at first, that we would be happy. But she was so calm, so confident. She kept our lives running smoothly, and... and I had grown to love her. She deserved to be happy, to be alive, to bring another child to my hearth... but it was not to be," he shook his head. "Mut decreed otherwise."

Ayla did not know what to say. "I know this is not the same," she said, "but I, too, know what it is to lose a loved one. At least you know you and Tricie had each other, and that she loved you, and you loved her."

She touched his cheek. She meant it as a gesture of comfort, but then her eyes met Ranec's and something stirred inside her. Before she knew it, his mouth was on hers and she was responding to his kisses with a hunger she had kept up penned – she now knew it – far too long.

She had met many men along her journey home, and some of them had made advances, but somehow – in a friendly, playful way – she discouraged them all. She was simply in no mood to share Pleasures with anyone. But she was home now, and she was woman, a live, warm woman with needs that were re-awakened by feeling Ranec's compact muscular body next to hers.

Ranec's hands began fumbling with the tie of her leather wrap. Then, very suddenly, he froze.

"Ayla," he said, breathing with difficulty.

He was staring at her with a look full of longing, yet would not move. She was confused. "What is the matter?" she whispered.

"Do you remember... do you remember our first time together?" he asked.

"Of course I remember," she said, "it was on the night I was adopted... the night when I became Mamutoi."

"I asked you to come and share my furs, and you did. But only later, after you left, I learned that you did it – that you did it because you were trained to obey any man who asked you to share his furs."

"It is true," she nodded, "it was the Clan way."

"You don't know how it tormented me, Ayla. After all that had happened, I realized you only went to my furs because you felt you had to. In a way, it was like I forced you."

"Oh, Ranec," she said softly. "One man did force me... and he was nothing like you. You are kind and caring, and I enjoyed sharing Pleasures with you."

"I know," he said simply, "but if you had not come to me then, Jondalar would not become jealous, and you wouldn't agree to make a Promise to me. Isn't that so?"

Now a grimace of pain flitted over her face. She withdrew slightly. "It didn't matter in the end," she said. "I went away with Jondalar, didn't I? I went away... and I came back."

Ranec took both her hands in his. "I just wanted to say you do not have to share my furs," he told her gently. "You don't have to do this to comfort me, or out of guilt, or because you are afraid to disappoint me. You have come back as a free Mamutoi woman. I have no claim on you, Ayla."

Ayla felt tears prickling at the corners of her eyes, but they never trickled down her cheeks. A hot flush of desire washed over her body as she leaned forward to kiss the man who cared so deeply, the man who had suffered so much.

"I don't have to," she said, "but I want to, Ranec."

She pushed him down and drew the curtains around them.


	5. Chapter 5

Ayla lifted her head up from the waste basket, fighting down another wave of nausea. There was no point denying it. Her moon blood had not come, her breasts were starting to become heavy and sore, and she has been having difficulties to keep anything down for the past two days. Should she be surprised? It has been a long time since she stopped drinking her special morning tea, the one that kept her from becoming pregnant while it was inconvenient.

And now it has happened. She was with child. She was sure of it, and she was frightened.

But then she thought about it. Why should she be frightened? She hadn't wanted to start a baby with Jondalar before they reached the Zelandonii, because it would make traveling almost impossible. For the same reason she had not wanted a baby started on her journey back to the Mamutoi. But now she was home, she was with her family. She was in a safe, warm place with plenty of food and her own space at the Mammoth hearth. There was nothing to prevent her from birthing and raising this baby. As she thought it, she felt thrilled. She had wanted another baby so badly. The gap left by Durc still ached, and she had so many unused resources. Well, now she was going to be a mother again – and this time, no one would take her child away from her.

Still, one thing remained to be done.

"Ranec?" she said quietly. She wasn't sure whether he was asleep or not.

"I didn't realize you were awake too, Ayla," he said, making a place for her to sit by his side on the sleeping platform. It was becoming comfortable to her, to sit with him like this... they have shared furs several times since their first nightly encounter, and though not much was said about where they were heading, both felt physical joy and emotional comfort at this closeness of being entwined in each other's arms.

It is better to tell at once, she decided. "I am with child, Ranec," she said.

His eyes widened in shock. "Does this – do you – are you – " he spluttered. "Ayla, do you mean to tell me you think you are carrying a baby of my spirit?"

She smiled. "I know it is your baby, Ranec. I have told you once, I believe life is started when men and women share Pleasures. I have shared Pleasures with nobody but you since I came back. The baby is yours, and I thought you ought to know it."

He took her hand. "Ayla," he said in a hoarse voice. "Be my woman. Come to my hearth, and bring this child to it."

She shook her head slightly. "There is no need to rush, Ranec," she said softly. "I'm not going anywhere. There is plenty of time to decide whether this is... this is what we both want."

"I know this is what I want," he told her firmly, "and this time, I know I want it for the right reasons. I used to want you as a trophy, as a perfect woman... but now I know there is no perfect. Now I love you, Ayla, not just for beauty and talent, but for goodness and kindness. And I have Ralev to think of. Do not be offended," he said quickly, "but I must consider him as well, when choosing a mate. I know you will be kind to him, as if he were your own. Not every woman would. And besides..." he took a deep breath. "You have suffered much, and so have I. You left, and you came back. And now you are expecting a child of my spirit. Is this not a sign from Mut? Is this not a plain message saying we should be together?"

Tears glistened in her eyes. In that moment, Ayla was coming to terms with what was, what had been, and what would never be. "Yes," she said.

He looked a little confused, as if he hardly dared believe. "Yes?"

"Yes, Ranec, I will be your woman. I will come to your hearth, and bring a baby to it, and be a mother to Ralev."

The Promise was soon made, to the general joy of the Lion Camp. The official joining would not be made until the Summer Meeting and the Matrimonial, but Ayla already moved to the Fox Hearth. In her heart, she and Ranec were now mated, and she knew he felt the same way.


End file.
